


Shattered Illusion

by goodieblanker



Category: Naruto
Genre: Action/Adventure, F/M, Fourth Shinobi War, Romance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-01-22
Updated: 2015-05-23
Packaged: 2018-03-18 18:44:56
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 17,218
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3580005
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/goodieblanker/pseuds/goodieblanker
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>There's a throbbing ache throughout her body, and it feels like she's being crushed and stabbed and "please, please make it stop. Please."</p>
<p>NejiHina. War. Multichapter.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Covered Still

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto.
> 
> Author’s note: Hey guys, so I've decided to cross-post here. I haven't abandoned this fic, I'm working on it and I truly want this to be complete. Thank you for bearing with me.
> 
> NejiHina. Take on the war. Spoiler-heavy. Takes place directly after chapter 437 of the manga. There will be no heavy political clan stuff here, a lot of those could already be found on other fics. It would be more of like a behind the scenes, incorporating canon with my imagination. 
> 
> They’re old enough, is what you need to know. If you need numbers, instead of three, the time skip is SIX. Enjoy!

Hinata wakes, and gasps to a piercing pain in her chest. There is a throbbing ache throughout her body, and it feels like she's being crushed and stabbed and _please, please make it stop. Please._

The taste of copper, heavy and loaded, on her tongue. The world is spinning, moving. Bile rises to her throat and threatens to choke her. She wants to move, cry out, but her limbs are imbued with lead. She hardly recognizes that the pressure on her back and thighs are arms, hands—holding her, cradling her and muffled words— _be okay. You're safe. Hinata. I'm here. You're going to be alright_. She lets out a strangled sob, and feels the grip on her tighten. The pain is overwhelming.

She surrenders herself to darkness.

* * *

Hinata slips in and out of consciousness. Constant shadows smother her, and are only broken by the sudden glow of honeyed light now and then. The pain that seized her— _minutes? Hours? Days?_ —before slowly recedes to a heavy weight of numbness. She peels her eyes open, only to find them closing again, her lids heavy and uncooperative. She takes a deep breath.

Her memory is a muted blur. The dry pitted turf of the battlefield. A haze of black and orange. Naruto pinned to the ground. The cold wind against her face when she jumped. Her words. _How she told him_ —

She blinks and tries to focus on where she is. A vast expanse of green cloth surrounds her, hanging on thin wooden frames. There's an unmistakable earthy smell of bark and wet leaves heavily overpowered by the stench of antiseptic and bloodied bandages. The cot beneath her, stiff and prickly, brings attention to the soreness of her muscles. Hinata slowly turns towards a faint rustling by her side, ignoring the whimper that escaped her throat in doing so.

He is seated on a chair beside her, back slumped, elbows propped on his knees and hands clasped in front of him. Head bent, his hair is a cascading wall of inked silk, obscuring her view of his face. She raises herself up on trembling elbows and calls out to him.

"Ne—"

She suddenly jerks and doubles over, releasing body-wracking coughs. Hinata grips the sheet that fell from her shoulders as she strains to breathe. She hears him mutter a curse between heaving gasps and heat rises to her face, from both the effort and embarrassment. She's grateful for the flask of water he provides her. Once her lungs stills to a tolerable calm, she downs the liquid instantly.

"Thank—" she clears her throat, "Thank you, Neji-niisan."

Neji merely takes the bottle from her and sits back down, the chair creaking under his weight. His robes shift when he moves, and her eyes follow the wrinkles in them. Hinata looks up and frowns at the absence of his hitai-ate, exposing the mark, a glaring shade of green against the palette of his fair skin. And _his hair_. His hair, always immaculately smooth and flowing, now appears disheveled and tangled, dark strands sticking out _everywhere and_ —

It takes her a moment to notice the sudden change. The silence surrounding them stifles her nerves. His back is rigid, his lips set in a thin line. Hinata wonders if it's because she's fully awake now, or because he's _aware_ that she is.

She glances down at the bottle in his hand and blinks back up at him. His eyes—all hollow and dark shadows underneath—narrows and his frown furrows deeper.

"I…are you a—"

"They were all revived. The citizens, as well as those—"

"Neji-niisan."

"—you have to report to Gai when you can. He would assign you to—"

"Neji," she says. There's a plea in her voice. He hadn't looked at her like that for a long time. _Such a long time._

It doesn't take a lot to understand why he's like this. But she hadn't prepared herself. She hadn't been thinking—No, that isn't entirely true. She has had time to think. Between the moments of doing what she did and saying what she said, she had plenty of time to think. She just hadn't prepared herself for this. _It's too soon, too soon for her to deal with._

For what feels like hours, they are both silent. When she can no longer hold his glare, she brings her gaze down, and tries to smoothen the white cloth draping her legs. Her eyes flicks back towards him and she finds the muscles of his jaw clench and unclench. Neji isn't looking at her. His glare, instead, is aimed at the foot of her bed.

"Why did you do it?" he says, his voice hard.

"I-I'm not sorry for what I did, Neji-niisan." She swallows past the dryness that clamps her throat.

The sides of his eyes are covered with thick veins, his byakugan has activated. His anger are coming off in waves now, and she resists the urge to look down again.

"And I…I understand why you—"

"No, you don't," he growls, jerking to his feet. "I want you to tell me why, _why the fuck_ you—what were you even—do you have any idea—" He raises the hand that held the bottle as if he's going to throw it, but the loud thump of plastic against the ground never reaches her ears; his hand remains in an awkward suspension above his head. He releases a frustrated groan and lifts his eyes to the ceiling, bringing his hand down to his side.

"It wasn't just stupid, what you did, it was irresponsible, reckless, and if you thought—"

" _Stop_ ," her voice closes to a whisper. He leans back and closes his mouth, and she continues before he can.

"I…" she says, "I acted according to what I believed in, Neji-niisan." She rubs a hand against her chest, trying to ease the tightness there; a throbbing ache at the back of her head is starting to follow close behind it. "A-and you have no right—no, don't you dare tell me otherwise because you," she lets out a faint, humorless laugh. "You, of all people, know this."

_You would've done the same thing._

Neji says nothing. And in the drowning silence that follows, any other noise seems obnoxiously loud; rustle of clothes, huff of harsh breaths, thump of a bottle as it hit the floor. He isn't glaring at her anymore, although his eyes still hold hers with such intensity.

Her vision is starting to blur, and it's her turn not to look at him. She pushes the frustration that's starting to build inside her, down, down somewhere she can't reach it. Because she doesn't want to do this. She doesn't want a fight with him.

Hinata moves to wipe the tears tracking down her face, but his hand beats her to it.

She hasn't sensed him move, and she looks up at him in surprise, for he is closer now. _A lot closer_. The rough pad of his thumb dries her cheeks, his palm cradling her jaw. The touch is so gentle, so light, an absolute contrast from the look he has on his face, from the way he's acted just moments before. And she freezes, because she doesn't know how to handle the volatility of his reactions.

"You almost died."

Her breath hitches then, because she knows, knows the look on his face. Knows from the way he says it, from the tone of desperation she hears in his voice. The urge to move away from him or to pull herself closer to him merges in a confusing mixture inside her head; though it all boils down to doing something, _anything_ , to stop him from looking at her like that.

But before she could, all too suddenly, he is gone.

* * *

The process of revival is a cruel thing; Hinata has come to learn, as her fingers dig into the rubble and raises another layer of jagged stone. A child is buried underneath and her byakugan indicates that she has less than a minute before the shallow breaths turn to a grim halt. With a grunt, the final barrier almost gives way, but a sudden ache at her side forces her to lose the hold she had. Her arms threaten to buckle under the weight of the huge wall.

"Kiba! Help—I can't—"

The pressure is lifted from her arms, and she rushes to grab the child. Ignoring the pain that seems to intensify, she reaches into the opening of the piled cement. The child gives out a cry and Hinata drags him out and lays him on the ground, kneeling next to him. She takes out bandages from one of the pockets of her belt and begins attending to the dark, bleeding gash at the side of his thigh. The child has fainted, but his breathing is even and slow now, removing the dread that overtook her moments before.

They were all revived, alright. The lives of everyone from the village were returned to them, but it wasn't without consequences. Their injuries were sustained, immunity to the pain was nonexistent, and every single one of them was found exactly where they were before Pain's devastating attack. _Exactly._

"Whoa. You should've called me earlier, Hinata. This thing's really heavy."

When Kiba tosses the broken wall to their side, the ground shakes slightly, and gritty particles of dust scatter and fly all over the place. Hinata coughs and covers the child's face with her hand, and notices the ugly purple bruise under his matted hair. He throws his hands up in apology.

"Oh, shit. Sorry, sorry. I didn't mean to." Kiba whistles to Akamaru, and the dog raises his head from where he and Shino, with his bugs, have been digging. He bounds his way over to them, his massive body coming to a halt next to Kiba.

With a pen and scroll from another pocket, Hinata writes the words _possible concussion_ , _minor bruises_ , and _healed wound on thigh_ before strapping the rolled scroll on the child's shoulder. Placing the child on his back, Hinata gives Akamaru the nod and he takes off to the infirmary.

She coughs again and this time—without the surge of adrenaline numbing her—clutches her side, willing her chakra to focus on the stabbing pain. She should be using her chakra sparingly; healing the child took a lot from her, and this is only their third rescue. They are far from being halfway through with the area and her chakra levels already border on a dangerous low. But there is something unbearable about the pain that makes her think otherwise. Clearly, she hasn't recovered as well as she has thought.

Kiba dusts himself off and stretches his arms upward. Mumbling an _alright_ under his breath, he turns to Hinata. The grin slips from his face, and he's next to her in an instant. He grabs her free hand, while the other hovers behind her, and she leans onto the support he's giving.

"Hinata? What happened?" He looks around them and curses. "Were you attacked? How did they—"

"I'm alright, Kiba. It's just…I must've pulled a…muscle lifting that thing." She winces. The pain is searing now, the green glow from her hand providing little to no help at all.

"You shouldn't be pushing yourself too hard," he says, squeezing her hand lightly. "It's only been a week since…since _that_ happened, and you just woke up, what—yesterday! Damn it, I can't believe Gai-sensei already sent you out here. That assho—"

"Kiba," Hinata looks up at him. She's thankful for his concern. _Really_. "I was the one who volunteered for this. Gai-sensei, he…he was skeptical too, but I thought I was already fine and…" she trails off as she sees Shino nearing them. She hears him ask what has happened before another jolt shoots through.

"Let's call it a day, yeah? We need to take you back to the infirmary, Sakura should still be there." Kiba steps forward and guides her to the path Akamaru had taken earlier. She leans away from him and breaks from his grasp.

"…Sakura?"

"I—what? Yeah, you know…she was the one who healed you after that—" Kiba runs a hand through his hair and reaches a hand out to her. "C'mon Hinata. You don't look so good. We have to go back _now_." Shino gives a grunt of affirmation.

"It's alright, I _am_ alright." Kiba shoots her a look that tells her he obviously doesn't believe her.

"I can find my way back. I'll leave the rest to you and…and I'll come back later to finish, I promise," she says.

"No, Hinata. Don't be stubborn," Shino says.

They both step forward, crowding her. "Kiba, Shino, please." Hinata raises a palm to stop them from going any further. The buzz from Shino's bugs is all that could be heard as she attempts to reassure them, although the smile she gave becomes more and more of a grimace.

After a lot of blinks from her and glares from both her teammates, Kiba tugs at his hair and huffs a _fine_ , and she quickly turns to the trail, waving them a goodbye.

"You better not come back unless you're fully healed!" Kiba shouts behind her. She raises her hand again in a wave.

Hinata releases a heavy breath as stabs of pain synchronizes with every step she takes.

* * *

Konohagakure had seen better days. The bustling village of the Hidden Leaf—the village honed and praised for being one of the most powerful, possessing one of the finest and most elite shinobi army—was replaced by a huge bowl-shaped crater, right in the middle, surrounded by endless piles of concrete, cracked roofs and shattered glass.

The base is located at the west side of the village, with the suggestion of the medical team, as they've found it to be of greater advantage if they are near a water source. By the time Hinata reaches the infirmary, she is panting and beads of sweat is lining her brow. The entrance of the base is farther, _so much farther_ , than she recalls and the pain hasn't made it easier for her to get there any faster.

The revival has only been recent, and there are still dozens needed to be rescued and retrieved from the heap of Pain's destruction, for not everyone had been able to hide under the sanctuary of the underground shelter. Those who are found are taken to the base immediately, and once healed; most of them have put up tents near the infirmary, tolerating the flimsy wall of green as a temporary excuse for shelter and a place to live in.

She's been healed and kept in her tent, Kiba told her. So Hinata hasn't had the chance to visit the infirmary herself; although her team has already filled her in on what to expect.

The infirmary makes up for their lack of a proper hospital. Medical-nin hurries to and fro, from one bed to another. The smell of blood and sterility is heavier here, mixing with the foul stink of vomit and excrement. She's been informed that they are severely understaffed, and Hinata would've assisted them if her locating abilities aren't more of an invaluable aid to the village.

She makes her way through the mass of wailing, wincing patients, and finds Sakura by the corner of the room, along with the line of a dozen people. Hinata sits herself down the end of the queue, next to a sign that read _Get In Line, Or Else_ with a badly drawn fist.

"Hinata?"

She looks up. Sakura's done with the old lady that came before her, and is preparing for the next patient in line. Hinata breathes a sigh of relief. Feeling the crescent shapes on her palms marked by her nails, she has focused on _that_ pain to keep herself alert. It's been excruciating, the pain has intervals edging on tolerable to too much. She's tempted to give another try in alleviating the pain, but her chakra dwindles to near nothing now, and she can't afford another black out.

"I'm surprised you're already up and about." Sakura lifts her jacket, and places the green glow of her hand on the side that hurt. "You really shouldn't be putting yourself in stressful situations right now, Hinata."

She gives a nod, and closes her eyes at the lack of pain at her side. She wonders if what's happened yesterday with Neji could be considered as a stressful situation, in the emotional sense. She shoves the thought away and instead voices what she's noticed earlier. It's gotten dark outside and no one is lining up behind her, making her Sakura's last patient.

"Yeah, we don't cure patients after dark anymore. We found out three days into the revival operation that it wasn't such a great idea, exhausting chakra in healing," she says, "Unless of course, there's an emergency or it's something life threatening."

"Sakura-san, why couldn't I—"

"Heal yourself? This is what I've been telling you, your wounds…" There is a lengthy pause. Hinata opens her eyes and finds Sakura staring intently at her. "Just…just don't stress yourself out, alright? You don't have to heal those you've retrieved on the spot, just leave that job to us."

Sakura breaks her gaze and walks over to the cart containing her medical equipment. "After a week or so, your chakra levels would be back to normal, so don't worry." There are several clatters of metal against another before Hinata rises to her feet.

"Thank you, Sakura-san, for today and…and for that day," she says.

Sakura turns to face her and smiles, "It's nothing really, and I can't take all the credit for myself."

Hinata cocks her head to the side. Had her injuries been that serious? With Sakura already healing her, had they needed more medic-nin to heal her? These questions must've painted themselves on her face, because Sakura laughs and shakes her head.

"No, I mean, Neji should have his share too. He found you on the battlefield, well," Sakura continues, "His team did, but he was the one who carried you over to where we were at the time."

 _Oh_. "Still, thank you." she says, and heads toward the door of the infirmary.

"Hinata, wait."

She stops and turns back to the pink-haired kunoichi. Sakura is looking at her strangely, like she hasn't been smiling and laughing just a minute ago, determination etched on her face.

"Why…why did you do it?"

"I—why did I—" The question takes Hinata by surprise, even if it isn't the first time she's confronted with it. And the thought that this wouldn't be the last she'll hear of it nests at the back of her mind.

"Your wounds, Hinata. They were _fatal_ , and if I hadn't healed you in time—"

"I…I would've done it for any of my friends, Sakura-san." Hinata cuts her off. She hasn't given her answer much thought and later she would wonder if she meant it.

"Would you, really?" A frown graces Sakura's forehead. Hinata doesn't give her a reply, the air around them becoming heavier as minutes dragged on. "It isn't…It isn't because you love him?" Sakura suddenly asks.

Hinata is grateful for the silence of the now almost-empty infirmary; the silence that carried her question voiced in such a low volume. A cold wind creeps up and tightens itself around her. She's never heard what she feels for Naruto put in such a way; with such accusation and…and hurt. _Does she, does Sakura also—?_

It's clear that she isn't the only one taken aback by the question; the woman in front of her has her eyes wide and a hand covering her mouth, as if to stop what's already been said.

"I'm sorry. It wasn't my place, that wasn't—I…I'm really sorry, Hinata."

"It—it's fine." Hinata turns for the door once more, and hasn't the nerve to look back.

* * *

It's already well into the night when Hinata finally drags herself to her tent, after mindlessly wandering the woods outside the base. Everything's been surreal, as if she's been at the sidelines all along, observing, watching all of it unfold in a great speed, but at the same time, in motions that could barely beat snails.

She has yet to gather her thoughts when she's greeted by the sight of her Father, Hanabi, and Ko, standing by the entrance of her tent. Before Hinata could utter a greeting, Hanabi's small body flings itself upon her. Hinata throws her hands up in defense, surprised to find her sister up for a spar in the middle of the night, even after not having seen each other for how long.

But instead of an attack, Hanabi has her arms around her waist and her head is buried in Hinata's chest. It takes Hinata some time to recognize the hug that her younger sister is giving her, in front of their father, no less.

"Ko reported…he told Tousan everything." Hanabi whispers. "Neechan, is it true? Did you really—"

Hiashi clears his throat, and Hanabi eases her hold and steps away from her. Hanabi holds her head high, despite the blush coloring her cheeks, the night failing to hide it from eyes like theirs.

"Otousan," Hinata says, bowing her head. She hasn't had time to visit them when they were hiding underground, and she's relieved that there are no serious injuries to be seen. Ko is behind her father, his arm in a sling, and his eyes holds an unvoiced apology, revealing the reason why her family is here now, regardless of how late it is, or how long they've been waiting.

Hiashi schools his usual frown, and Hinata prepares herself for the lecture that would follow.

"I'm pleased you are well," is all he says, laying a hand on her shoulder and giving her a curt nod. He gestures to Ko, and both the Hyuuga men walks away from her, leaving Hinata to stare after their backs.

"Neechan, I have to go too," Hanabi says, calling Hinata's attention back to her. "I heard Neji-niisan's occupying the other bed in your tent, so I don't have to stay with you tonight."

This is _news_ to Hinata. "I…I don't think he'll be staying here anymore."

After Neji left yesterday and she was able to collect herself, Hinata stumbled out of her tent. Rows and rows of other polygonal green ones surrounded her own. She tried to find Neji, only to bump into everyone but him. Then Gai found her, and gave her the immediate task to _revive her youth_ , as his words. So her volunteering wasn't entirely true, but Kiba needn't know that.

She had gone back to bed tired and her heart heavy, and hadn't sensed anyone near. Neji did not return last night. She highly doubts if he'll change his mind tonight.

"He came out of your tent this morning, Ko told me so." Hanabi says.

"I-He wasn't…I hadn't seen him." Did he really? Ko isn't one to lie, he would have no reason to.

"You're getting sloppy, Neechan. What would Tousan say?" Hanabi gives her shoulder a light shove. "We've set up camp outside the main house, or what's left of it anyway."

Hinata smiles. The way Hanabi has said it, with a light tone and a smirk on her face, it's as if she'd told Hinata of her pranks on a branch member, and not of the destruction of their clan's land.

"How is everyone?" she asks.

"You'll see tomorrow, Tousan will be the one to fill you in about that."

Hinata nods. The air has gotten chilly, and she pushes the flap of her tent open, waving for her sister to come inside.

"Neechan…" Hanabi stays on her spot, and grabs the sleeve of Hinata's jacket. "I'm glad," she says.

Giving another light shove, Hanabi smiles and waves her a goodbye, following after the path Ko and their father has taken.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: To those who've read the manga, you will soon see some very, very familiar scenes. Guess what chapter! Heehee. And no, it wouldn't be one hundred percent true to the manga. This is NejiHina we're talking about. Chapter 614 shot us straight in the face on that one. Tsk. Reviews and constructive criticism are welcomed.  
> +Following canon manga. So this is Ko, the manga version.


	2. Halfway

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto.

If Hinata has been counting, today marks the sixth day she's last spoken with Neji.

The night of her family's visit, she's kept herself awake and—believing what Hanabi said to be true—waits up for him in the orange glow of the lantern near her bed. She hadn't seen it earlier, but there was indeed another one besides her own, though it looked clean and made, giving no evidence that Neji had slept there at all.

She waits, waits, and finds herself waking up to an aching back, with only two hours of sleep, and still no sign of him, his bed, still smooth, stark white, and wrinkle-free. She hurries to the communal bathroom near the infirmary—provided by the council for those who volunteered in the retrieval operation—readies herself for their mission, and blinks her disappointment down, down the drain.

The sky is lit with streaks of pink and orange, the warm glow of the sun growing brighter, sharper, as she jumps, runs, towards their designated area; the place where Kiba and Shino would be waiting, they told her, breakfast in tow.

"Gai-sensei was looking for you, Hinata." Kiba says, mouth stuffed.

_Again?_ "Did he say why?" she asks, reaching for another egg roll.

He shakes his head, and they continue eating in silence. Just as Shino opens his mouth to say something, a flash of green drops down from somewhere above them, landing right in the middle of where their food had been. They all draw back in alarm.

Lee raises his thumb in greeting. "Good morni—uhh, oh."

"You fucker!" Kiba shouts and tackles Lee to the ground.

Akamaru seems less deterred than his master, and looks pleased as he gobbles up what is left of their breakfast on the ground. Hinata begins picking up the scattered, empty containers when Gai and Tenten show up.

"Enough," Gai orders.

Kiba releases his chokehold on Lee and the coal-colored bugs that has swarmed them earlier retreat to the sleeves of Shino's jacket.

Tenten holds her hand out. "Sorry." She smiles, helps her with the containers, then joins her green-suited teammate, who's now sporting a large bruise on the side of his face.

"Hinata, a word," Gai says, facing her.

She follows Gai, who stops a little farther from their group. Ever since Kurenai became pregnant, Gai and Kakashi has been their mission-leaders, taking turns, giving them assignments; missions that involved having to work with a member or two of the other team. Hinata wonders what specific task he'll ask of her that he has to talk to her personally, even when her teammates are only meters away from them.

"Your father called for you," he says, "Neji already went ahead."

The conversation she had with Hanabi comes back to her. "Gai-sensei," she says, "Would you please tell them..." she glances at her teammates.

"Yes, yes. Now off you go." He gives her a wink and a smile full of teeth.

She lowers her head in thanks and heads toward the compound.

When she nears the front gates of the main house—the pristine white pillars, now dirtied, crumbled and torn in half—Hiashi has his back to her, and it's Neji who spots her first. She sees his eyes dart in her direction, sees the slight tilt of his head. But instead of acknowledging her presence, he turns away from her and continues the hushed conversation with her father.

Hinata has to call their attention to her, and feels the heat of her blood rushing up at Neji's blatant disregard of her person.

"Otousan," she says, giving her usual greeting.

She, too, refuses to look at Neji, taking part in this game she hadn't wanted to be involved in, in the first place. Hiashi gives their interaction, or lack of it, no mind and proceeds to inform his daughter of the instructions he'd been giving Neji before her arrival.

* * *

From the crisp leaves in the trees of the main house garden, down to the very last brick in the kitchen walls of the branch house, no part of their clan remain undisturbed. A number of people from the branch houses need to be rescued from under the rubble.

Hiashi has assigned each byakugan-user a partner, made certain that someone from the main would be paired off with another from the branch. Hinata refuses to see any political implications in her father's decision. She simply wants to look at it as both houses working together to save their clan.

Hanabi approaches her from a distance, with Ko following right behind her.

"Neechan," she says, "Told you, didn't I?" and smirks, gestures to their surroundings with a quick glance.

"Yes, you did." Hinata couldn't stop her hand from tucking a hair behind her sister's ear.

"Hey!" Hanabi swats her hand off, like one would with a buzzing fly. She shoots her a heatless glare, and Hinata returns it with a smile.

"Ko-san," she greets her once-bodyguard, and he bows his head in reply. "How is your arm?"

"It is fine, Hinata-sama. How is—"

Hanabi suddenly punches the side of his arm, and Ko bites his lip, holds in a scream, it seems.

"This old timer's as good as he'll ever be." Hanabi laughs; whether at Ko or at his pain, Hinata's reminded of her sister's sadistic tendencies. "Oh, hadn't meant to do that."

"Hanabi…"

"I really didn't mean to, I swear," though her grin swears the opposite. "Well, we better get started," she says, and starts dragging Ko by his good arm, "See you in a while, Neechan." Both of them take off to the west side of the compound. When they're far enough, Hinata brings her attention back to the area in front of her.

* * *

It doesn't take them long to survey how many people they'd have to dig out, as the sea of broken, irregular fragments of stone become mere transparent barriers for their eyes. But it takes them five days to pull everyone out from the debris, with seeing through the walls being easier than clearing them aside.

Neji has been near her the whole time—he is her partner, after all—and has helped her in lifting, pulling, dragging the heavy masses of stone to free those trapped inside, though not one word comes out from either of them.

Their fingers graze the other, their shoulders bump, and handful of times they're both close, so close, she could feel the hair rise on the patch of skin his breath touched. But he thinks nothing of any of it, looks the least bit concerned, and she follows suit.

If Hinata has been counting, it's in the sixth day she decides that she wouldn't let it bother her.

Though she wonders if what had happened, what she'd done, has been so terrible _for him_ , because his reactions are far worse than those of her immediate family. They barely talked when they were children, true, but the thought that he could dismiss her so easily now, after countless hours spent on their training, days she's been with him, meditating, that small smile he gave when she—

A sudden nudge on her shoulder stops the train of her thoughts. She squints, half-raising herself up from where she's been sitting—a wooden surface of what used to be someone's porch, someone from the branch house—and sees Neji towering over her, his silhouette contrasting against the sun high above them. Her gaze drops to his outstretched hand, the one holding a circular container. Stares at it long enough for her eyes to sting, before she raises her hand to grab it.

Hinata glances back and forth between the cold object in her palms and the man sitting himself down beside her. It is three, four taps of her finger against the lid before she opens it, and Hinata couldn't help the smile that breaks across her face, seeing the gooey crimson of a dish she knows would be sweet, would be wonderful on her tongue.

She looks at him again, and her smile stretches at the lift of his own, at the shift in his eyes when his finally meet hers.

He hasn't said a word to her, hasn't voiced anything that clued her in on what he really felt, what he really thought. But she doesn't need him to, because he's Neji, because this is enough. For them, this is enough.

* * *

Hinata was on her way to the training grounds—a field just outside the base—when she heard someone say that everything's almost back to normal; as normal as it could get for a destroyed village such as Konohagakure.

They've all fallen back into routines. They've gotten all the villagers out from under the mess, and the ones that occupies the once-hectic infirmary are those who've complained of minor scratches and embarrassing cases of diarrhea. Normal.

"You know what I've heard?" Kiba says, picking up a log in the middle of the field.

"Obviously not." Shino ducks out of the path of the flying log.

"Our _temporary_ mission-leaders won't be giving us things to do, for a while."

"That's why we're _not_ out here on the field, training, are we?" Shino says, sarcasm dripping in his monotone voice.

"Shut up. But get this," Kiba gestures for them to come closer, dropping his voice in a whisper, "It's 'cause Tsunade's not doing so well."

"Who told you this?" she asks.

"Heard it when I passed by Nara's tent." Kiba suddenly jerks his head around, searching for something they would never see.

"Don't think she'll go down that easily, though," he says with a shrug of his shoulders.

Hinata nods. They all know that Tsunade gave up an immense amount of chakra for using Katsuyu to protect them when Pain attacked, but not to this extent. It's been days and news from her, good news, are nowhere near in sight.

Breaking the small circle they've made, Kiba absently scratches Akamaru's side. Suddenly, something black darts right where Shino has been standing, and lands hard on a tree far from them.

"That's for being such an ass." Kiba grins and holds up another kunai.

"You're getting slow, you call that throwing?" Shino raises his arms, and a swarm of his bugs comes pouring out. Hinata could see his smirk from under his jacket.

She smiles at this. It's been awhile, and she realizes now how she's missed it.

"Hey! I'm not letting you off easy just 'cause you've been unconscious for a week!"

Three of the sharp objects rush at her. She moves, lets out a laugh, and activates her byakugan. _Normal_.

* * *

The lantern in her tent is switched on, and the alarm inside her head blazes before she sees him entering, lifting the flap open, and closing it behind him. She has to remind herself that it isn't just her tent, it's _theirs_.

"What happened?" he asks, eyeing her arm that's covered in blood.

"Training." she says, trying to sound nonchalant.

Their training had gotten out of hand. While she'd managed to dodge the rain of kunai Kiba threw at her, she was unable to do the same for the one Shino hurled at her head; in her panic, and—she had to admit—sluggish reflexes, she raised her arm as a shield. Later, when she had managed to stop the bleeding and close the wound a little, there had been a lot of shouting on Kiba's part, and repeated promises of ice cream from Shino.

Hinata searches for her bandages; the ones she knows are tucked beneath her bed, and catches the frown he gives her. He's not angry at her for this, is he?

His mouth falls open, but must have thought against what he's about to say, because he just releases a heavy sigh and turns his back to her; and it's in seeing his bare and exposed back before her, that startles her awareness on the way he looks—like he'd just gotten out of the bath—and the white bottom half of robes that he has on, the only ones he _has on_.

"How…how are we—?" she doesn't finish her question, because surely he isn't planning on changing here, right in front of her. Though this poses a problem for her as well. Their bathroom is a public one, and all of them are generally advised to change in their own tents to prevent any holdups in the use of it. This hasn't concerned her, has agreed with it even, until now.

"Hinata-sama," he glances at her over his shoulder, "You've already seen me naked."

"What? N-No, I have—I've never!" Heat intensifies on her back and greatly on her face, though her embarrassment is replaced by something else when she sees the smirk that's forming on his face, and realizes that he's trying to get a rise out of her.

She narrows her eyes and directs it to his bed, away from his back, away from him. She reaches for the cloth she's been wiping her blood with earlier, sits on top of her bed, and continues the task of cleaning the surrounding area of her wound.

"Where have you been sleeping before?"

"Here." he says, like it was an everyday fact.

"Here?" her hand stops. She couldn't tell if he's lying.

"You are getting sloppy."

"You—"

"Hiashi-sama told me that we'll start rebuilding next week." he says.

"I know," she can't help the snap in her voice.

Because she does. She's been with him when her father had told them about it. She knows the words he hasn't said. That they'll stay together for a week inside this tent. Apparently, _another_ week together, because he's somehow managed to sleep in this tent without her knowing it, without her sensing him at all.

He could be lying, but his echo of her sister's words makes her think otherwise. And it downright bothers her, if it's the truth. Because it means that she's stepped far, far back from what she's capable of, that her skills in detecting another presence, _his_ presence, has severely declined to match a child, an ordinary _civilian_ child.

"The council will be holding some kind of meeting tomorrow." he throws his towel on the bed.

He's deliberately changing the subject, but she doesn't let the previous one drop.

"That bed looks as if you've never slept on it," she says.

She gives another harsh wipe to her arm, harsh enough that the dried clot in her wound breaks, and fresh blood seeps out.

"You should have told me, though. I wouldn't have had to wait for you for hours until—"

He grips the hand that holds the bloodied cloth, and takes it from her. She's made the wound worse, she knows. The gash is wider, and more of her blood trickles down from its mouth. He kneels in front of her, and presses the cloth firmly, but not too hard.

She keeps her glare on their arms, on the wound, on the blood. She isn't as angry at him as she is at herself. She truly has been slacking. S _loppy_. And by the looks of the wound on her arm, she has to pick herself up, soon.

"Neji-nii—"

"Neji," he says.

She looks up this time, and holds a breath. Kneeling in front of her, his head is leveled with hers, when in normal circumstances, it would only reach past his shoulders. His eyes bore into hers for several beats of her chest, before flitting across her face, like he's searching for something, something she doesn't know.

"Neji. You've called me that before," his voice seems lower, deeper.

"I…"

Then there's a crash from outside their tent, and they both jump, stand up and assume a fighting stance facing the doorway. The cloth, thrown on the floor, is forgotten, like the things she's felt seconds before. The flap starts moving violently, as though someone is fumbling to open it.

Lee pops his head inside, and his whole body follows, stumbling.

"Kakashi…he carried—" he says, winded and out of breath. "It's him. He's here."

Lee swings his arms around, mimicking the style of his drunken fist, though his breath indicates that he's nowhere near any alcohol. Both of them hasn't managed to say _who_ before he speaks again.

"Naruto…he…he's back."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: Oh, snap. Laughs. I'm aware of the changes I've made from canon. There are scenes from the manga that I've tinkered with, here and there. If you find those changes, hooray! :)
> 
> Hope you enjoyed this chapter. Reviews, thoughts on the chapter, constructive criticism on my writing? I would greatly appreciate it.


	3. Begin

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto.
> 
> AN: Spoiler-heavy like I said. Haven't changed anything for their ranks. Neji is still Jounin, Hinata is still Chūnin.

Everyone's been informed of his arrival, it seems. A massive crowd—almost all of the villagers—have gathered, some of them forming smaller clumps; hushes and murmurs of stories about him, about what could've happened, rushing out from them; some are making bets while others only listen to those who guessed.

Hinata pushes her way through, her feet acting on its own volition, bringing her to the front, bringing her closer to the man with the yellow blond hair. She stops in her tracks just as Kakashi emerges from the thick shadow of the woods, with Naruto on his back. Whispers suddenly turn to thunderous shouts. As she takes a step back, she could see everyone streaming by, running to him through the well gathering in her eyes. Wiping them with her hand, the tears continue to flow as her thoughts run. _Thank you, thankyouthankyouthankyou_ —

"Naruto!"

"Welcome home!" they shout.

Naruto's jaws hang open and his eyes widen. Children push and pull on his jacket, and the older ones are shoving to get a chance to ask him their questions.

"What's he like?" one asks.

"Are you hurt?"

"How'd you do it?" asks another.

Kakashi is smiling behind him, the visible part of his face squinting in amusement. She sees Sakura make her way through the lively crowd, and the children gathered around him parted to make way. Her face is masked in a frown and her hands are clenched as she approaches Naruto.

"Sakura…" Naruto says, and is met with a brutal punch in the head.

Then, everything seemed to happen instantaneously. One moment, Hinata was with the villagers, surrounded by them, surrounded by their roars of cheer; and the next it's as though they are covered, hidden by a dark curtain, and all she could see is Sakura, and _her_ arm, circled around Naruto's neck.

"Thank you." Sakura says.

Hinata finds her lips lifting, a stretch of muscles that is entirely off, out of place. The feeling—all too strange yet somewhat familiar—reminds her of a time when Ino had asked for her assistance in perfecting a ninjutsu; the one that the Yamanaka Clan is renownedly known for. She vaguely wonders if said ninjutsu caused the smile present on her face; a smile that is not her own.

But such a thought is ridiculous; because she is _happy_ , because Naruto's safe, he is alright, _he is right there._ And it isn't a powerful clench, which left her numb and cold but all too aware, that she feels in her chest. _It isn't_.

* * *

"Where the hell's that old fart?" Kiba throws another kunai, joining the other five on the ground.

"Hey!" Tenten and Lee shout in unison. The girl narrows her eyes at Kiba warningly.

"They've called some jounins for a meeting, something must've held them up," Shino says.

"We've been waiting for fuck knows how long," he jumps from Akamaru, and collects his thrown knives. "We could've spent the time training, damn it!"

"Then we'll wait some more, you can't just—"

He sneers at Shino. "You're not the leader, nor the boss of me, nitpicker."

Hinata has to grab and stop Shino's arm from rising, preventing the release of his anger through the form of small black insects. Kiba's right, it's been hours. But there are times when his attitude in these situations can wear their patience thin.

"Kiba, I'm sure he'll be here soon," she says.

"Yeah, Gai-sensei wouldn't call us out here for nothing," Lee adds.

"Shut it, you still owe us breakfast," he growls. The memory must've triggered something inside Kiba, for he tenses and looks ready to pounce on Lee.

However, Gai appeared before any of them can make a move, his face grim. They all stand back and greet him.

"Good, you're all here," he says.

"Damn right we've been here all—" Shino elbows Kiba in the gut. He clutches his stomach and mouths a curse to his teammate.

Gai ignores this and motions for them to gather around him. The air around him is solemn, devoid of his usual cheer. "Tsunade-sama," he pauses, "she…she's in a coma."

There is a gasp from someone, a pair of widened eyes, and a _no way_ from Kiba.

_Coma_? "How…what happened?" Hinata asks.

"This doesn't concern us, I'm afraid. As for the Hokage's position," he says, "Danzo-sama shall take that position for the time being." Gai's voice is monotonous and strange as he delivers this.

"I shall be meeting you again, soon. But for now," Gai looks behind him, "you can all go." And he's gone.

They say nothing, each trying to process what's been said and what they've heard, until Kiba scoffs, breaking the silence.

"Well, why'd he make us wait? That was a complete waste of—"

"We have to tell the others," Lee exclaims, eyes wide and hands moved about in frantic circles.

"What makes you think they weren't informed like we were?" Shino asks.

But Lee isn't listening, and he takes off just as fast as his sensei, dust swirling to where he once stood.

"Who the hell's Danzo, anyway?" Kiba scratches his head roughly.

"I…This is bad." Tenten says, shaking her head slowly.

"Why? What is it?" Hinata asks.

"I thought it was just a rumor, and…and we just heard it when Shikaku-sensei had been drunk but," she's becoming pale by the minute. "It all makes sense. Now, _he_ could do it. Shikaku-sensei said he hates the guy—"

"Get on with it, woman!" Tenten glares at Kiba. She closes her eyes and breathes deep, ignoring his indignant " _hey!"_ when she turns her back to him and faces Hinata and Shino.

"Danzo, once he becomes Hokage," she says, "Will immediately order the disposal of Uchiha-san."

* * *

They'd understood what Lee meant, his desperation to tell the others, to tell Naruto. The three of them had decided to look for him separately. Kiba had taken the path near the construction site, while Shino chose to look for him in the west woods.

Her heart is racing, hammering through her chest in a wild drumbeat as she runs towards the base, past the tents, and stops in front of the infirmary. She pushes the door open. _Not here_. Sakura isn't inside either; the infirmary's empty, so maybe—

She turns at the sudden spike of chakra she's felt behind her. Sees a pair of hooded onyx eyes before darkness engulfs her vision.

* * *

When she wakes, it's to a rough shake of her shoulders.

"Hinata!" She blinks up at Kiba's wrinkled brow. _Huh_? _Where_ — She groans, and he holds her arm as she sits up.

"Shit, the hell—you're bleeding," Kiba stands, rummages through a nearby cart and takes out bandages.

_Bandages? The infirmary. How—_

Her thoughts are in tangents, and the pounding force in her head is making her dizzy.

"What happened, Hinata?" he asks.

"I…I don't…" She can feel her lids drooping, heavy weights against her eyes, as if sleep firmly rejects to release its hold on her.

Kiba unrolls the bandages, but instead of going for her head like she thought, he goes for her arms, for the large gaping cuts on her arms. Two sets of angry lines, and another beside the wound she received from training. She doesn't feel a thing, not a sting, nothing from down her neck, but the pounding in her head intensifies.

_What happened?_

"Kiba, don't…you don't cover them like that," She takes the soaked bandages from him, and places her glowing palm on the wound.

"Shit, sorry. I—should you be using your chakra? Who did this to you?"

"I…" she suddenly remembers, "Have you found him? Have you told Naruto?"

She stops healing herself, and turns all her attention to Kiba.

"Don't do this, Hinata. Tell me who did this?" he growls.

"It's nothing," she says. Because she doesn't know, _she doesn't know._

"Did you find him, Kiba?"

"Damn it, Hinata."

"Kiba, please."

He runs a hand through his hair, and looks at her, exasperated. "I did. Found him with Kakashi and Sakura," he says, "Now finish that or I won't tell you the rest." Kiba gestures to her arms.

She closes her wounds, or tries to. Her healing is careless, shallow, red still leaking at the sides, but she quickly covers them with the cloth he's given her. It might've been the lingering smell of her blood, or because the infirmary has always stunk of it, that Kiba fails to notice this.

"So I uh, told them about Danzo. Man, was that a mess. When I found them again, Naruto's face was all jacked up," he says, speeding and stumbling through some of his words, "Then I saw Sakura entering Tsunade's tent _—_ or was that before, uh, anyway then Naruto, well he..." he suddenly stops, and stares at her.

"What is it?"

"Don't know how to say this. Shit, Hinata. He's gone."

" _What_?"

"No, not gone, _gone_. He just left, told us he'd finish some business in the Land of Iron."

She blinks several times, and several times more. He's gone.

"Kiba," she says, "Thank you." and raises herself up from the floor. "I have to go."

"Hinata…" He moves to grab her, but she's faster. She's reached the door by the time he gets up. The pounding is gone, and she knows it's adrenaline coursing through her veins now.

"No, wait. Hinata, wait!" is all she hears before she runs.

* * *

The metallic tang of wet stone sits at the base of her throat, and the smell of rotting leaves reach her as she surrounds herself with clumps of bushes, with dark trunks of wood. Dim patches of the sky glimpse through the tree breaks. She feels it now, the vindictive sting of her wounds. Throbbing, calling her attention. Whatever sedated her earlier must've worn off. Who did it? And why? Beause there's nothing else on her. No other sign of assault apart from the cuts.

But she buries these questions, hides them at the back of her mind, in favor of the thoughts currently circling her head, of the person she wants to see at the moment. It seems so long ago, the last time they talked, the last time she said those words to him. He's gone. He is—

Her eyes widen. There it is again. The sudden rise of chakra. Activating her byakugan, she raises her hands in front of her. She couldn't stop the swell of fear that rises within, because she remembers, recalls all too clearly that she's felt this before. It's the reason why there are ugly gashes on her arms. A twig snaps behind her, and she turns around swiftly.

The bulging nerves in her eyes sink back to her skin, and she lowers her hands. "N-Naruto-kun?"

He stands not far from her, hands shoved in his pockets. "Hinata-chan," Naruto says, smiling up at her. His eyes are shadowed by the trees that stretched up above them, but his hair still glares bright despite the darkness. His face, which held no bruise, makes her wonder about the things Kiba just told her.

"How…I thought you'd—why are you still here?"

Naruto looks at her quizzically, his head tilted to the side, and she realizes how brash and intrusive she must've sounded.

"I…uh, n-never mind," she says. She's now extremely aware of every breath she exhales, every shift in their movements, every sound. He hasn't left. Not yet. But now that he's here, her mind comes up blank, empty. "I-I'm glad you're back," she starts, gathering her courage, bracing herself, "and…and what I said, back at the battlefield, about how…how I—"

"Wait, Hinata-chan," he says, rubbing the back of his neck, and there was a long, long pause before he continues, "I'm...I'm sorry."

She could hear the fluttering of wings somewhere to her right, the trickle of water flowing far from them, and it was nine, ten hoots of an owl above before she swallows and blinks up at him.

"I just don't…" he sighs, "You understand, right?"

"Of course." Words are out of her mouth before she even has the chance to process what they mean.

"And I—"

The rest of what he says are lost to her, because it's as though everything closed in on her, all of a sudden, like hands grabbing her windpipe, gripping the sides of her head, and refusing to let go. Her gaze strays to the trees, the ground below her, everywhere except to the spot he's in. She couldn't look at him. The floor tilts, moves, and she has to steady herself.

_Of course_.

She takes a step back, her legs shaky, turns and takes another, once, twice, until she is running, until she's far from that place, far from him. Far, far away.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: Hey guys. Like I said, this is going to be like a behind-the-scenes thing so for those of you who've not read the manga, you can find some continuity in chapter 450 and 451..and the other unfamiliar things, well, plot going on right there. Oh, no SakuraBashing please. That scene was taken from canon; Canon-goodness that makes NejiHina all the more delicious.
> 
> Mention of Sasuke does not include him in this story, sorry. See Chapter 451 for details. Sasuke isn't the only one with onyx eyes, people. Just clearing that up for those of you who might think this is a NejiHinaSasu triangle. It's not.
> 
> Not much NejiHina on this chapter. Sorry about that. Would make up for it though, so keep on reading! haha
> 
> Big thanks to those who've reviewed, favorited, and followed this story! You guys...hugs! :D
> 
> Reviews, thoughts on the chapter, concrit on my writing, I'd still be grateful for them.


	4. Answer

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto.

She stares at the skeletal pillars protruding from the roofs and piles of concrete, the rubble that used to be buildings, houses of Konohagakure. Layers of gray and white, of dust and dirt. A blanket of destruction, of _chaos_. There's a silence so deafening, so thick, it leaves her ears with a continuous high-pitched ring, drowning out any other noise from her head. The night is a long gone memory, casted aside by visible splashes of light.

Someone must be looking for her. She hasn't told Neji where she went; she probably shouldn't have left Kiba so abruptly like that; and her wounds need to be attended to, the bandages are now dry and stubbornly stuck to her skin. But she keeps her gaze fixed in front of her, keeps her feet rooted to the ground, unmoving.

The absence of any other noise evens out her breathing to an order of regularity, a far cry from the pants and gasps that has threatened to escalate to hyperventilation hours before. The dull palette of her surroundings makes the pounding in her chest dwindle to a steady tempo. Brown, white, and gray. _No yellow, no pink, no orange, noyellownopink –_

She jumps at the weight of a hand on her shoulder; her own loosens its grip on her head before she's even aware of its presence there. Strands of hair break from her hold; dark blue threads cling to her fingers like silk webs on a wall. He found her.

"Neji-niisan." her voice is hoarse, dry.

The light touch on her shoulder is gone, and his hand is held out in front of her, palm-up. Hinata moves to stand, but the stinging ache from the joints of her knees jolts her to the reality of how she's been in that position for far too long. Absently giving a nod, she takes his offered hand, leaning into it as she dusts the dirt and small stones off her skin.

She doesn't turn fully to face him, head still bent and eyes intent on the ground before her. The prickling of blood returning to her extremities is like a sharp slap as she realizes _what just happened and how she lost it, she was losing it and her chest feels so heavy—_

Breathing out heavily, she tries desperately to find something, _anything_ , to distract her from her thoughts. _Neji._ He hasn't let go of her hand yet, and she focuses on the warmth of his hand and the tightness of his grip and—

"Hinata-sama."

She huffs a small laugh, though the sound is hollow, empty in her ears. "I…I can't count how many times you've been angry with me."

Glancing up at him, she already knows the questions he wants to ask. Knows that it concerns her tear-stained cheeks, her blood soaked bandages, her presence at this place, at this time. His frown gives her the urge to move away, so she pulls her hand from him, but he only holds it tighter. And the pressure of his fingers on her palm is a button, a switch that frees the words she's exposed to no one else.

"I told him," she whispers, ignores how her voice shakes, "I told him I loved him."

Emptiness wraps between them as they just stand there. The only indication he heard her is the sudden stiffness in his shoulders and the bob in his throat as he swallows. Then, her hand falls limp against her side when he let it go, as if hers are made of the things he wouldn't want to touch. His eyes are dull, clear of anything, not even a small hint of the anger it possessed earlier.

"What do you want me to say?" his voice is hard, cold. "What do you want to hear from me, Hinata-sama?"

Another wave runs down her cheeks, of what, she doesn't know. Like the answers to all the questions they have for her, answers to the questions she has for _herself_. She doesn't know.

"Take me home, Neji-niisan," is her reply.

* * *

Home is in the form of a small green tent, with two hard cots and a lantern. Hinata had followed closely behind him, quiet throughout their journey to it. By the time they'd reached their tent, the sun had risen high up above them, spreading its warmth to the conscious and alert villagers.

She sits down at the foot of her bed, removes her bandages, and couldn't help but wince. She shouldn't have left it alone for so long, she thinks. Concentrating, her wounds knit close with the chakra radiating from her palm. She's almost done with the last one when Neji takes a seat beside her. He reaches for her left hand, despite his aversion for it earlier, and starts covering her forearm with a clean set of white binding; doesn't bother to ask where she's gotten these scars marring her skin.

Finding nothing else to preoccupy her, she settles with staring at the way his hair falls and shifts from his shoulders, smooth and dark. Remembers how he used to tie it up higher behind, and has to hold herself back from touching it, from letting it slide between the digits of her hands.

She follows the movement of his arms as the white cloth juggles between his hands, then focuses on his shoulders, his neck, his face. The skin around his eyes look tired and drawn, as if he hadn't slept last night, and if it's from waiting up for her then she supposes they're even, though it doesn't stop the guilt inching slowly at the thought of her being the reason for his state of unrest. She chooses to break the silence, just so she could smother the impulse to ease the wrinkle in his forehead with her fingers.

"I never thanked you," she says.

"For what?" he motions for her right, and she holds it out in front of him.

"For carrying me to Sakura," she raises both her arms slightly, "And for this."

When he finishes and sets the metal lock of the bandage in place, their eyes meet. White so similar to hers, yet different, the way he holds her attention captive with it. And she's brought back to that time, when she's only had one wound to mend, when the hurt twisting, circling her had been caused by a kunai and nothing else. Tuning out the speedy beat thrumming inside her, she gives him a small smile. He breathes in deep, chest jutting out, air filling his lungs, and she waits for him to say something, but there is only the slight part of his mouth as he exhales, and no words follow. So they stay like that, for a while, her right hand in his, resting there, the stillness holding them in its calm embrace. She breaks her gaze, and leans in, brings her mouth closer to his ear.

"Thank you, Neji-niisan" she breathes out, "For saving me, that day."

It could have been the effect of the serenity surrounding them, or perhaps she only wanted to show him how indebted she was, could have been both, but later she'll think of how muddled her thoughts must've been, when she brings her lips to his cheek, grazing his skin lightly.

Then he stiffens, his other hand fists at his side, his jaw tight, and she moves back quickly, jerks both her hands to her lap, her face heating up to a high degree. "I-I'm sorr—"

"It's my duty." he says, his face blank. The creak of her bed pierces through the air around them as he stands up.

 _His duty_. "Your duty." She repeats, like something unpleasant on her tongue. Any trace of the peace she has felt disappears entirely, ripped by the implications of his words.

"I understand," she says.

Laying herself down on the bed, she turns her back to him. The cot is still stiff and her pillow is thin and uncomfortable, but she rather prefers it now, truly befitting of whatever's currently blinding her. So it's just her then, who thought them as friends; who thought them as something more than what their clan had branded them with.

"Sleep well, Hinata-sama."

Hinata veils her sight with the void behind her lids as she hears him leaving, and prays for a sleep of black and white, for dreams of oblivion, even for just a moment.

* * *

Her mind has not been kind, and Hinata has to force herself to take the weary brunt of being awake in exchange for the images that plagued her even in the confines of her subconscious. If it means she's merely been sleeping for an hour or two, so be it. She sits up, rubs her face, and finds a mixture of sweat and tears there.

The position of the sun, when she gets out of the tent, tells her it's past noon, and she wonders where they're training today. Turning at the corner of a third tent, she comes to a full stop as she almost bumps into someone. He's surprised as she was.

"Hey," Kiba says.

He's holding a lunchbox, from the looks of the patterned fabric that wrapped the container. The sudden nip at her stomach from the smell of food reminds her of the last time she ate. "Brought you something to eat," he raises the box, "Since you didn't show up this morning."

"Kiba," she says, "about yesterday…"

"Yeah?"

"I'm sorry."

It is silent before he says, "That's it?" he tilts his head to the side, and guilt nags at her with the outlines of concern on his face, "Look, Hinata. You can't—don't worry us like that, alright? And, you know…we get it, what with Naruto going all fuck knows what…"

He reaches out to touch her shoulder and she flinches, a slight jerk away from him, barely noticeable has it not been Kiba's hand she's just rejected. She convinces herself this is just from the lack of sleep. _Only_ from the lack of sleep. His eyes narrow, gaze suspicious.

"You sure you're alright?"

"Yes," she says firmly. Before he could say anything else, a rumbling could be heard, from both of them.

Kiba laughs, the sharp ends of his fangs showing, "Fine, let's forget about that shit and get moving with this thing." He raises the lunchbox. "I'm hungry as hell." He grins at her, and she mirrors his own—although to a lesser extent—for his mood is infectious, momentarily erasing the torture that is her dreams.

* * *

She jumps to another branch, but the moment she brings her foot down, the wood snaps. Trying to break her fall, she extends her arm out, has merely managed to snag a sharp twig before she's falling again, and there is only so much she can do with the lengthy distance of the branch to the ground. She groans at the impact. Stumbling, she falls on her hands and knees.

"What happened?" Shino drops down beside her.

Parts of her sting, and there's nasty cut on her palm from the twig. Pushing herself up from the ground, she slumps against the tree she fell from.

"We're still not that far from Yugakure, do you want to go back?"

"No." she says, "It's okay Shino, it's just a cut."

Hinata takes out a bottle, proceeds to pour water on her hand, but the liquid is warm, too warm—since they've gotten it from a river in Yugakure—making her blood gush more extensively than before.

"Hot water only makes it—"

"I know," she cuts him off, and quickly grabs a cloth from her belt, "I guess I forgot."

The pressure she applies makes the bleeding manageable, although her brows furrow when the glow from her hand refuses to show itself. "I-I'll just heal it when we get back," she tells him. Maybe it's just the hot weather that's impeding her abilities. Or that fall earlier.

"It's odd," he says.

"What is?"

"That they've been sending us out on these missions." Shino looks at her hand, his head bending down to show where he's looking, before he further elaborates, "Yesterday, they sent me out alone to Shimo."

 _Alone_? "Shimogakure? Why?"

"Delivered a scroll, similar to the one we just gave to Yuga."

"Who…who gave you the mission?" she asks.

"Someone from ANBU," he shrugs, and she remembers how those of higher rank had to hand their missions to them since Danzo's reign started. "It had the Hokage's seal, so I went with it." There is another pause, "Who gave you this mission?"

"Gai-sensei," she says, "but he specified that I take you with me."

He sits down next to her, crosses his arms against his chest. "Kiba's by himself on a mission today, too." he says.

She nods, and that seems to end their conversation. She wonders more about the part where they'd been sending out shinobi on their own, alone, to villages a bit far from Konohagakure, villages that aren't totally aligned with them.

The sun has set when they've reported to Gai, but on the way back to their village, her eyes dart somewhere to her right. Despite how everything blurs when they run, or how the trees surrounding them are nothing but identical, this one in particular fully steals her attention. It's uprooted; its roots wrangled with the dirt that clung to its ends. Lying down on the ground, branches broken, snapped into tiny pieces, leaves no longer surrounding its frame.

Thoughts racing as to why this fascinates her, her gaze lingers there, and stops in her tracks. It isn't until Shino calls for her to hurry up that Hinata turns her head, fighting the itch to look back at the tree, pushing the unsettling feeling she has in her gut, and follows after her teammate.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: I know there are issues with some readers disliking japanese words on some stories because it slows down the reading, but I want to retain the names of the villages because…c'mon. Read, "Why are we in the Village Hidden in Hot Water/Hidden Hot Water Village?" That's just…not that right.
> 
> Yugakure – Village Hidden in Hot Water
> 
> Shimogakure – Village Hidden in Frost
> 
> I hope you guys would give reviews, thoughts on the chapter, concrit on my writing, cause I'd really appreciate it. Oh and thank you for those of you who'd reviewed, favorited and followed this story. I hope you enjoyed this chapter and the following ones. Cheers!


	5. Deny

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto.
> 
> Hey guys, I really wasn't satisfied with the way I handled some parts of this chapter, and I had to go and make some revisions just so I'll be more content with it. I hope you enjoy this one as much as I enjoyed writing it.

Her skin is unpleasantly damp, sticky, and the desire to remove her pants, her jacket—even the sweat-covered mesh underneath it—hinders her focus, distracts her like the incessant sharp-edged sting from the cut on her left palm. Opening different pathways, Hinata channels another ripple of molded energy, copies what she's been doing for hours now. She lets out a breath, _Get it right_. Her foot turns in a semi-circle behind her, the other one following after it. Repeats again, and again, until her revolutions mimic that of a wheel in perpetual swing, only hers aren't as endless.

She loses the handle of her footing, and before she knows it, her hands lurch in front of her, preventing the face-first fall to the hard ground. She heaves, and squeezes her eyes shut. Her chakra supply hangs just between letting her stay conscious and fainting; the point where she needs to stop, has to stop. Not even enough to summon a healing glow for the cut on her hand.

The sun, which has been directly above her head when she started, now sinks beneath the trees to her left, and has yet to see any progress from her. Hinata pinches her lips together, her fingers stiff as they curl into the fronds of grass, magnifying the burn on her palm, the squeamish churn of her insides. Releasing a sigh, she raises herself from the field, fights the gravity that clings on her shoulders, on her back, on every part of her, and trudges back to the base.

* * *

Insistent tears flow down Ino's cheeks, her sobs broken and pitiful. She buries her face in her hands as she collapses on the piled blocks of wood.

"Ino…" Choji sits down beside her, and gently pats her lower back, while Tenten holds the blond kunoichi's hand. "Shikamaru's right, he's no longer a part of us. He's a branded..criminal," he says, his brows pinching in worry, "And if we don't do it, a great war could break out. We can't afford that."

Kiba huffs and crosses his arms, then looks at Hinata, motions for her to do something. She shakes her head and mouths a _No_. It'd been strange to hear Shikamaru's plans. She, herself, hasn't let the news sink in fully, and understands why Ino would need time for this.

"Would the council be informed of what we'd do?" Lee asks, perched on top of higher piles of wood just behind them.

"I don't think even Shikaku-sensei knows," Choji says, "Shikamaru wanted this to be just between all of us here."

"Not even Gai-sensei?"

Choji shakes his head, "We'll tell them eventually, once we kill Sasu—"

Ino releases another anguished sob, bends deeper that her face is an inch away from her knees.

Kiba makes an aggravated sound, "Fuck's sake, quit crying Ino!"

"Don't talk to her like that, Kiba!" Tenten yells back, her hands balling into a fist, "Ino's just—"

"Well, what else can we do?" he bares his fangs at her. Akamaru whimpers beside him. "It's no longer like before. Sasuke fucked this up big time."

"That's enough Kiba," Hinata says, bringing her hand to his shoulder. Ever since he's been back from his mission, his temper flares even more so than usual. His shoulders sag at her touch, though the frown and petulant pout remain, reminding her of a child backing down from a fight just because his mother ordered him to.

"Who's going to tell Sakura and—"

"Let Shikamaru deal with it," Neji says; who, Hinata realizes, has been silent the whole time. His eyes though, aren't on Shino's—who asked the question—his glower is in the direction of her hand, the one on Kiba's shoulder. Her fingers involuntarily twitch. The last time he's spared her a glance was when—

She concentrates on what Choji is saying. "—next week on who's he taking," he says.

Her focus wavers. She still feels his glare anchored at the back of her hand, but when she peeks at him from the corner of her eye, his attention's no longer within the vicinity of her presence. This doesn't dissolve how she's now conscious of her fingers resting against the cloth of Kiba's jacket, when a few seconds ago, she found nothing wrong with letting her hand stay there. She lowers it, clutches the elbow of her other arm, and tries not to let his stares, or what it all _meant_ , unnerve her further.

"Ino, you understand though, don't you?" Tenten asks, her voice soft, soothing, different from the barks and snaps she reserves for Kiba.

"I-I do," Ino hiccups, lifting her face from her hands, "I get it, but…just the thought…" Her features scrunch up, and her bawls become louder.

"Damn it, she's going to take forever. I'm out." Kiba throws his hands up, then mounts Akamaru, "Tell me if I'm part of the team that'd off the bastard, Choji, if not, don't bother me with that," he gestures to Ino and leaves. Tenten sneers at his back and mutters unintelligibly under her breath.

Choji sighs and turns to her, "Hinata-san…it's Ino's turn to check up on Tsunade-sama. Could you…"

"Yes, Choji-san," she says, "I'd be glad to."

Hinata nods to the rest of them. She doesn't know what compelled her to glance toward Neji, but when she finds him looking back at her—even though it's only a glimpse, even when her eyes quickly darts to the road in front of her—the flashing beats in her blood, and the erratic flutters in her stomach make her wish she hasn't.

* * *

Choji must've had the dates mixed. Hinata checks the chart a third time, and it is Sakura's name, written in bold black characters, on the white paper hanging outside Tsunade's tent, not Ino's.

"—can't be that blind!"

She jumps at the raised voice. The ones stationed to check up on Tsunade should only be Shizune and another female medic-nin. Hinata frowns. The one she just heard certainly isn't the voice of a woman. The conversation continues before she could decide whether to stay or leave.

"Sai," Sakura says, "w-what are you—"

"I don't really know everything that's going on," she hears him continue, "I don't understand people, either. And I don't know what promises he's made to you but—"

Her eyes widen. She should've left. _Her_ name on that paper screamed for her to leave, return to Choji, tell him he'd made a mistake. She shouldn't be listening to this. This was a…a violation of their privacy and she needs to move her legs. _Now_. Move before—

"Sakura, even I can tell that Naruto…that he," She is two steps away from the tent, but the walls are too thin, not enough to block the words from reaching her. "He really loves you."

* * *

Her mother had embraced her tightly, so long ago, at some family dinner party. Powdery scent showered her as lithe, porcelain arms wrapped her tiny frame. Someone from the council had given such a scathing comment about her, said words that weren't fit for a child to hear.

"Hinata, listen," she whispered in her hair, "When there are things one doesn't want to hear, those words would draw out as muffled sounds, and would pass through your head, like a speck of dirt through a huge, huge barren field, carried by the wind, unnoticed, unimportant."

Her mother smiled down at her, kissed her forehead and rubbed their noses together. Both of them giggled and laughed, ignored those around them, those who stared, tsked at such behavior being displayed in a formal party.

Hinata wonders now, why everything he said, why every word that came out of Sai's mouth, she heard with such clarity, with a volume so loud; like she had been directly next to him, and it's in her ear he'd been addressing the confession to, not to Sakura, not to where she'd been standing, hidden behind the wall of Tsunade's tent, meters away from them. Words she's certain she does not want to hear, _never_ wants to hear.

There's a cruel coil inside her, twisting relentlessly until the need to move faster expands, suffocates her. She shakes her head to clear the words and the faint sobs radiating from inside the white tent, but then _his voice_ fills her head, and she's drowning once more.

_You understand, right?_

Her breath stutters. She fastens her attention to the path before her, to the steps she takes to distance herself from them. The green of each blade in her way engulfs her vision as she wills herself to break the unrelenting feeling into something she could endure, _could ignore_ , and doesn't look up until she collides with something solid, and warm. Hands shoot up to her shoulders—grip too tight—stopping her descend to the ground, as her fingers instinctively fist the top of his robe. She blinks up at him through tousled hair, eyes wide, their breaths mingling in the tiny space between them.

"N-Neji-niisan," She has to— _what? Thinkthink_ — "Train with me," she says, finding it harder to breathe by the minute.

Neji straightens, setting her on her feet, a slight hike of his eyebrow as he takes her in. She releases her hold on him and he takes a step back, taking the warmth with him, "Is that an order, Hinata-sama?"

"No, it's—" His gaze shifts over her shoulder. How far away are they from the tent? She doesn't know, but it is panic crashing with confusion when she says, "Yes."

Her hands tangle with the sleeves of his robes, and slightly pulls him nearer, "Please. I need—" she catches herself, tearing her mind for something to say. She loosens her grip but still keeps their eyes leveled, keeps his gaze on hers.

"I need your…help on a jutsu."

His eyes narrow, stare at her for five lasting seconds—as if he could read the lie on her face, could see what she just heard by looking at her long enough—before he nods.

"Alright," he says.

She steps past him, then races to the farthest training field she could find, Neji following close behind her.

* * *

"Tenth time, Hinata-sama."

"What?"

"Exactly," Neji says, cuts in front of her, and strikes the side of her arm. She holds back a moan from the pain, and clamps the part where he hit her, the limb useless and numb. She could've avoided that if she hadn't been—

"—staring off into space for the tenth time." He withdraws from his stance, stands straight, and deactivates his byakugan. "If you're not taking this seriously, you're wasting my time."

This isn't helping. Her mind flies from her, and she finds her vision clouding, the tenth time as he said. _Focus, Hinata_. "I'm sorry," she says. His frown deepens, but he hasn't moved, hasn't left her yet. She reverses the obstruction on her arm, and resumes her stance.

"Please," she tells him, "I'll do better this time."

She strikes first. Second, then third, over, and over, targeting all the visible nodes she could find, until she halves her chakra into exhaustion. He blocks every hit she delivers, and his coupled assessment of her attacks are the least bit helpful.

"Too slow."

"Again."

His assistance on a jutsu has turned into a mere spar. They aren't even exchanging blows; he's an impenetrable wall. "I-I'm trying," she grits out. Sweat stings her eyes, and she's panting now.

"Try harder."

She changes course. Slips behind him, goes for the back of his head, but he turns just as quick, wraps her forearm in a tight hold, and swings her back in front of him.

"You're too tense," he says, and she couldn't stop the offending burn that surges inside her. She clings to it like a lifeline.

"N-No, I'm not," she says through clenched teeth.

"Really? You've beaten me in this kind of spar before, Hinata-sama."

Narrowed eyes snaps, and she swipes the kunai at her belt before she could stop herself.

Dark wood pushes uncomfortably against her back. He's shoved her hard against a massive tree, his right arm traps hers at the side of her head, while his left circles her side to pin the other behind them. His grip tightens, squeezes until she drops the kunai, and lets it fall to the ground. This isn't a real fight, and she swallows the awful taste of letting emotions smother her common sense.

Her discomfort recedes to a faint memory though, as she turns her head, had meant to glare at him, to break from his hold, only to have her attention divert to the part of his lips. The angry fire inside her is replaced by something else entirely. Harsh exhales blow across the scant distance between her face and his. Awareness of their proximity only increasing as Neji takes another breath, and their position unintentionally pushes her chest flush against his.

She blinks, digs an excuse for her staring, and glimpses back up. Finds his brows drawn together, and his eyes looking down, down. She's seeing things, surely, when his hooded gaze has lingered to her mouth, before slowly tracking up to meet hers. Warmth that centered on her chest floods other parts of her, and she's light-headed all too suddenly. And it's just him—his thumb grazing the cut she had yet to heal, his scent mixed with sweat, the rush of his breathing, the point of contact of her body to his—drumming on her mind.

He doesn't move back, nor does she, even when the pressure restraining her against the tree no longer exists. He must've felt the blaring pulse of her blood confined on his palms, her short intakes for air. The hand on her back clenches, and unclenches. His head seems to lower, inch forward, and a part of her brain chooses that moment to stop functioning, gives her the command to lick her _very_ dry lips, and wait, and stay still.

"It's getting late," he rasps.

Then he steps back, releases her arms, and breaks his gaze from her to look at her hand. All of a sudden, this large gap is between them, and she can't explain why her insides cave in, as if something's been robbed from her.

"I haven't—" he says, then clears his throat, "There's this mission—"

She nods. Right, she'd grabbed him and asked for training, hadn't even considered that he might have been on his way to headquarters.

"I—d-don't let me keep you," she says, fighting the warmth spreading on her face.

Neji clears his throat again, nods slightly and turns, and leaves her there, alone, with her thoughts scrambling to understand what he said, what happened, _could have happened_. Hinata grips the bark behind her, tries to find purchase to prevent from buckling under the weakness wrangling her knees. She has to swallow another lump in her throat, and tries to calm the torrent encased within her chest.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: Chapter 458 and 459, you guys :D check out the manga if want to know what happened to Sasuke and the rest of the gang…if you want to know what's going to happen to Neji and Hinata, read on, I say! :D
> 
> Thanks as always to those who reviewed, followed, and favorited this story. You flatter me, really. MOAR NejiHina!
> 
> Reviews, thoughts on this chapter, concrit on my writing? Haha hope you enjoyed this! It's a slow burn but we're getting there! If you know what I mean *wink* XD


	6. Move

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto.
> 
> First off, I apologize for the delay and I’m truly grateful for the support you guys. This chapter sparked that uphill climb for me, but it was fun and I enjoyed writing it. I made this chapter a tiny bit longer than the others, hope you guys enjoy this too! :)

There’s a tiny speck of dust floating at the corner of her vision, and Hinata follows its path by the side of the wall and out into the brown upturned mess that used to be their garden. It lands on the petal of a dying red flower, the tint dulled but still a vibrant contrast to the muddy lumps surrounding it. It looks soft, and the color reminds her of a warm breath exhaled through lips that look just as lush, and if she looks up, the color of _his_ mark would be so opposing to his skin—

“Neechan.”

Her head jerks to the sound, and wide eyes mirror her sister’s, before Hanabi replaces it with a raised eyebrow. “You okay?” she asks.

“Uh,” she says, and clears her throat that’s suddenly _very_ dry. The hands resting on her lap draw her full attention and she has to blink a few times before she looks at her. “Yes. Yes, I’m fine.”

“What’re you doing?” Hanabi takes another step forward.

“Just…meditating,” she says and smiles as her sister plops down next to her, willing the beat of her heart to slow.

“While frowning?”

“Was I?” Her gaze turns back to the patch of land, though it strays nowhere near the plant, “Would you like to join me?”

“Meditation’s boring,” she says, but Hanabi positions herself to match hers. “I don’t know how you and Neji-niisan could stand it”

Hinata shifts to restrict the flutter that wants to run along her spine at hearing his name. “Otousan likes them too, you know,” she says.

“Just goes to show that—”

“You still have a lot to learn?”

“That you’re all getting old and boring,” she says, “Time’s a waste in meditation.”

Hanabi huffs and untangles her legs to lie on the wooden floor, her head settling near Hinata’s hand. She can’t help but push few strands of her sister’s hair back, a gesture her mother used to do ages ago. “Then what do you suggest we old ones waste our time with?” she asks, and Hanabi doesn’t swat her hand away.

“Training, growing strong, perfecting techniques,” She beams up at Hinata, and thrusts her palms up in the air, “Beating Neji-niisan’s jūken.”

“It’s not always about strength, Hanabi,” she says. The hand playing with Hanabi’s hair turns palm up, and the swirls and curves on the pads of her fingers remind her the grace of their techniques. The power that strikes their opponents is a different kind of strength.

Silence expands between them before Hanabi lets out a sigh. “Yeah, I know,” she says, “But I’m still all about beating Neji-niisan to the ground.”

“And I’d be rooting for both of you.”

“He’ll be needing all the support he can get.”

Hanabi stands, and a laugh bubbles out of Hinata as her sister relentlessly starts punching an invisible opponent below the belt.

“Aren’t you moving back here yet?” Hanabi asks after she tires of throwing blows with air.

“Here at the compound?”

She nods and straightens her clothes. “It’s seen better days but it’s alright now,” she says, “Tousan arranged for it to work. The branch still needs repairs but the main’s good enough to live in.”

Hinata has only seen her father a handful of times now, and the tired set of his shoulders and the constant way he rubs his eyes speak the strains of having to bear the brunt of such destruction to their clan. With the main house working so closely with the branch, a glint slowly builds inside her, that this is a step forward for their clan, and not back.

“Alright. I’ll move back in,” she says. She’ll have to move her stuff in after Neji gets back from his mission. The mission he took after the—

Her memories are breezes fanning the fire in her cheeks, spreading and distending the heat across her face and to her neck.

“I’ll tell Otousan about it then,” Hanabi says. Hinata nods and closes her eyes, pretends to continue the meditation she never even started.

When Hanabi leaves, her attention drifts back to the flower. She stares and stares, until the sky is a blanket of violet, orange and red, weeping into each other until they blend to the color of ink that envelops her. Everything around her is shaded, but the petal’s still that hue of red, taunting her to swim through thoughts she doesn’t know what to make of. Like if she’d leaned in then, and pushed closer to touch his—

Hinata shakes her head and stands. It only takes her four steps to reach the plant, and a sweep of her right foot to bury it under a mass of dark, dark soil.

* * *

It’s her turn to deliver a scroll to another village alone, and it’s on her way back, just two miles away from Konoha, when she detects a kunai flying from her left. Hinata isn’t fast enough that it nicks her shin, the pain radiating like a harsh reprimand for losing focus on the mission and for tangling her mind with thoughts of _him_ , again.

Her byakugan reveals a man up on a tree not far to her left, and no one else in her radius. She can handle this. Throwing two kunais in his direction, she jumps and lands disabling punches on the right side of his body. The attacker falls to the ground, and she follows after him, bringing her fist back to deliver another blow when the sudden unmistakable whip of chakra strikes her senses into a paralyzing submission.

_It’s the same one._

She misses, and the man shoves her, and almost embeds a kunai on her shoulder has she not jumped away in time. Chilling currents crawl along the hair of her arms and her back, making them stand on their end, and burrows on her nerves as her eyes frantically dart from the man limping away from her, to the tree branches above her, the fallen leaves that surround their roots, and back to the man again. _Where is it? Where is it from?_

The man makes no move to charge at her again, his hitai-ate is nowhere to be seen, and none of his features tell her where his loyalties lie. She grabs another kunai from her belt, but couldn’t help the quick glance at her arms, certain she’ll find bare, open and bleeding wounds just like that night. When all she sees are the thin long scars left, a breath that pooled at her lungs the moment she felt the chakra is released. And in that split second she takes her eyes off him, the man disappears.

She runs in the direction he last stood and pushes her sight to stretch further than she knows she can. He’s gone, and it’s only after a few strong beats of her pulse does she notice that the weight of the scroll’s container is gone too. It was empty, so why would he take it?

The man might return with back-up and she’ll have no way of knowing if she can still defend herself then. Hinata grips her kunai harder and keeps her byakugan active as she sprints the whole way back, but it’s the thought of facing the one behind the chakra spikes that drives her to move faster, even as the wound on her leg and the ache on her thighs and feet scream for relief.

* * *

“Kiba!” Hinata calls out when his head pops out from one of the green tents. He turns to her, and as she nears him, the slump of his shoulders and the weak smile he gives doesn’t escape her notice.

“Hey Hinata,” he says, still with that smile never reaching his eyes, and there’s a dullness so unlike him that she stops and hesitates to go nearer.

“Are you alright?” she asks.

“Huh? Yeah, uh, yeah. I’m great,” he says, straightens and scratches his head. “Sorry, just had a week of hell, is all. Why does it feel like we haven’t seen each other in forever?”

“I just got back from my mission,” she says.

“Alone?”

She nods. Another ANBU nin has received her report, which doesn’t wipe the swelling and nagging thought that something is off after he’s told her that the attack, or the missing scroll container was of no particular importance.

“You too, huh?” Kiba says, “Next thing you know they’ll pair you up with people other than us. Just had a mission with Lee the other day, and I think they did it to torture me.”

“You should get some rest, then.” She smiles and he returns it with one like a trace of his.

“Right. Oh, and— I think your father was looking for you.”

“I know, thanks,” she says, “How many missions had you gone on alone Kiba?”

It’s like an invisible string has been pulled with how rigid his back has become. He turns his head, and stares somewhere to their right. “I’ll…I’ll tell you another time,” he says, “Can’t keep your father waiting, can you?”

“Oh. Okay,” she says, rubbing her arm and turning slightly away from him, “I’ll see you soon?”

“Yeah,” he says.

She’s not far from Kiba when she follows the dense pull to look back. The droop of his shoulders return, and he’s transfixed on a spot in the ground with muted and glazed eyes. Maybe he just needs to be alone right now, she thinks, and despite the will to ask him what’s wrong, she heads to the Hyuuga compound.

* * *

Blood bathes his arms and the right side of his face, drying to a shade that confesses how long he’s had them there. But they’re nothing close to the ones branding and devouring the white of his robes on his abdomen, beads of crimson leaking from the wound to the floor, the color so dark it sucks all the air she has. And it’s all she sees, all she _can see_ before she could fully step inside their tent.

What she wanted to say to him, what she needed to ask him, what she tried _so hard_ not to acknowledge for the past two weeks that’s slowly been weaving inside her disintegrate into embers lost in the urge to rush to his side immediately, and make everything alright.

Neji is sitting at the foot of his cot and if he’s heard her enter, he doesn’t show it, doesn’t even spare her a glance and just drops a soaked cloth in a small bucket next to his feet.

“W-what happened?” Hinata kneels in front of him, brings her fingers near the cut, and tries to keep the tremors from showing.

“Just leave it,” he says, his hand moving to cover his wound, as if it could erase the image already burned in her head. A hiss escapes through his clenched teeth, and he shuts his eyes as sweat dribbles down his face.

“No,” she says, “No, I won’t.” Because she will not let him do this. She will not let him push her away again, leave her to decipher the scattered pieces that paints the path out of the winding labyrinth between them. “Let me. Please.”

He looks at her, then. And as she holds his gaze, she longs to run the green glow from her palm over his eyes, too, if it could remove the emptiness she finds in them.

“Please, Neji,” she says, and his hand falters, exposing her byakugan to the black swirls diffusing from the cut that runs deep on the lower right of his abdomen, choking the branches of his chakra, and drenching her in the cold realization of what’s happened to him.

"We need to get you to the infirmary.”

“No, it’s—” He grabs her left hand just as she stands. Her mind races to find ways to drag him there when he says, “I already drank the antidote.”

“We still have to get the remaining poison out, you can’t just—”

“You don’t have to. It just needs to heal.”

“But—” He lightly squeezes her hand, and tugs her nearer, all the while staring up at her. And even as he schools his face in neutrality, his mask breaks from the pain she knows is continually stabbing him.

She releases a breath. “A-alright,” she says, “Okay.”

She turns, intent on getting the kit from behind her cot, when she’s drawn back by the hand he’s yet to let go.

“I have to give you something for the pain,” she says.

“I don’t need it,” he says, and pulls her back to him. She has to concentrate more on the task of healing him, and less on the flickers of warmth traveling from the point where their fingers touch, sweeping all the way to the planes of her face.

“Then…then, you have to lie down for me,” she says.

He follows, closes his eyes the moment she unbuttons and lifts his robe, and frees a long exhale when she directs the orb of her energy at his side. She sits cross-legged on the floor, and it’s a small favor that the cot is low enough she could still reach him easily without straining her arm. She works in muted air, uses her only free hand in knitting and merging his muscles, but she’s nowhere nearly half done when the weight of exhaustion hooks on her shoulders and on her back, and drags her down as it gets heavier and heavier, then flits to her head the longer she lets the glow from her hand drain her chakra.

“Don’t force yourself,” he says. She looks at him, and can’t help but wonder when he’s focused his attention on her.

“No, I could still—”

He squeezes her hand again and his thumb slowly runs back and forth across the back of her fingers, tempting her head with the empty space of his bed, near his hip, and close her eyes like he did. But she wrests herself upright, and takes the wet cloth soaking in tinged water. She can just wait for her chakra to recover while busying herself with wiping the blood circling his wound and his arms.

When she kneels to clean his face, he’s frowning at the ceiling, and her breath snags in her throat as the orange lamp reflects the glaring shine pooling in his eyes.

“I could’ve stopped him,” he says “I could’ve, but I just stood there and…” His free hand clenches at his side, and the one holding hers can’t hide the shake in his fingers.

He doesn’t say anything more, so she gently rubs his face with the cloth. With every brush, hidden gashes unveil themselves, and with every brush she tamps down the ache as sharp as broken glass heaving and wreathing its way across her chest at seeing him like this. She slowly traces the small graze on his cheek and the shallow cuts on his arm, on his torso, and she’ll heal these, too.

Hinata lets the cloth sink beneath the water saturated with his blood. She rests her head in his bed so she doesn’t have to see the wounds she can’t heal yet, grips his hand tighter, swallowing the trembles there, and sheds the tears he refuses to spill for him.

* * *

She wakes before he can lift the flap of their tent open, and the clothes on his back are no longer covered in red streaks that the white of it seems to glow in their dim tent.

“Neji,” she says, ignoring how she’s been saying his name without that honorific lately, ignoring how it feels _just right_ on her tongue. It’s only after he turns to look at her does she notice the soft sheets she’s holding, and the bed and pillow she’s currently lying on. He must’ve carried her to her bed sometime last night.

“I’m reporting back to headquarters,” he says, “I should’ve done it yesterday but…”

“But I—” she stops and doesn’t voice out how every inch of her wants nothing more than to let him stay until she’s healed every trace of his wounds, because she’d do the same were she in his place. “Um, Otousan would like us to move back in the compound.”

“Alright. Go back to sleep, Hinata-sama,” he says and lets in a triangle of sunlight as he opens the flap, “I’ll see you there.”

He disappears behind the green cloth. Hinata closes her eyes, but sleep no longer wants her company, it seems, so she gathers their things— two pairs of uniform for each of them, her kit, and the lamp between their beds— and puts them in a large brown bag provided for each tent when the restoration started. She takes another look back, another look at the bucket that’s now empty by the side of his bed, releases a deep breath, and leaves the door of their tent open as she walks away from the place she temporarily called home.

* * *

Every night she turns two halls from her room to get to his, and waits for him to slide his door open—even if he doesn’t use his lock—before she enters. The first night, Hinata brings bandages and replaces the ones he has on. They sit side by side on his bed when she heals him, because he refuses to lie down, and he’s not fine with her sitting on the floor. The second night, she brings him food, and he tells her he’d rather eat with her than let her watch him eat.

There’s warmth in her cheeks and her heart beats a little faster whenever she’s near him, which is amplified in her ears since they’re often wrapped in such stillness when she’s healing him, or when they’re eating. After, they’ll always have this tug of war on who’ll take the dishes back to the kitchen. He’s only won twice and only recently, because when she’s pulled a bit harder, he has stiffened and let out a small hiss, then she’s forgotten about the plates and tried to summon her chakra even though she has none left.

Tonight her shift at the infirmary has extended beyond her usual hours, and it’s nearly midnight when she delivers the two sharp knocks she always does on his door. It slides to her right almost immediately, and Neji glances at the lamp on her arm before he steps aside to let her in.

“I already have one in my room,” she says, “and…and I thought yours could use one.”

She places it on the floor a little farther away from his bed, and turns the knob that covers them in an orange glow. When she faces him, he’s already sitting at the side of the futon, and a frown is etched on his forehead as he stares at her.

“What’s wrong?” She sits next to him and directs her palm on his abdomen, “I-is it the wound? Are you in—”

He grabs her hand and holds it against his lap, her light slowly dissipating through the lines formed between their hands.

“You don’t need to do this,” he says.

She untangles her fingers from his, and resumes its position on his wound. “I know,” she says, and after a while she pauses and checks on it. The cut is so shallow now that even without her chakra, it’ll heal on its own in two days. “I…I wish you’d stop telling me not to help you.”  
  
“You don’t owe me anything.”

“I know.”

“And you don’t have to exhaust your chakra, every night, to heal me.”

“I know.”

“Then why do you?”

His voice compels her to look at him, and the things his eyes cast consumes her in a way that her words are seated uselessly in her tongue. She has to aim her gaze to the cut on his cheek, her palm just barely touches his face, and her focus in that small scratch is the only thing keeping her emotions from swallowing her whole.

And constantly, when it’s only the two of them—with silence stretching further and further, it’s bound to snap back and leave them with nothing but words that needs to be said—that she finds the will to do things she hasn’t done before, and say words she hasn’t allowed to leave the confines of her mind.

“Because I want to,” she says, “And it’s not because of duty, Neji.”

As the glow from her hand slowly fades, her palm cups his cheek, and she can no longer brush off the racing beats in her blood when he leans in to her touch. Her thumb follows a path across his skin, and a sigh finds its way out of her.

“It’s late,” she says, drawing her hand back. Hinata stands and slides his door open. She turns her head slightly, but couldn’t see anything beyond the corner of his mattress. “Good night, Neji.”

“Goodnight, Hinata,” he says.

Closing the door behind her, she closes her eyes, and her fingers try to cool the burn in her cheeks. She doesn’t remember how she makes it back to her room, for all her attention’s poured on thoughts slowly spilling from a place in her mind she believes she’s already locked tight, and kept hidden.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> See you guys at the next chapter! :)


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